As many colleges begin delivering admittance decisions, rejection becomes a reality worth facing
By Editor-in-Chief Allie Pecorin
My name is Allie Pecorin, and I am not going to Northwestern University. I was rejected.
It was my dream school, but I’m not going. I did all the leg work. I took all the necessary steps for admission. I am a four year athlete and a team captain. I am an editor-in-chief and an honors student who is part of the National Honor Society. I’m heavily involved in student media and seeking admission to a journalism school. I did absolutely everything that the university says it wants – but I was rejected.
And honestly sometimes it’s just that simple. Sometimes, regardless of the efforts put in to opening a door, life will decide to close it.
I worked extraordinarily hard in high school, but I didn’t get in. When that email arrived, I finally got a taste of life – and it’s bitter. Yet, for me, and for many of us, these rejection notices are our first glances at the real world. For those of us who are growing up now, in the millennial generation, this reality check is real.
Though each of my leadership positions and opportunities at North were hard-earned, my community, my schooling, and the world in which I have grown up have instilled in me, and in most of us, a certain level of entitlement. I subscribed to the philosophy preached to many of my peers. I was taught that if I worked really hard and I gave it absolutely everything I had, I would succeed simply because that’s what is fair.
And sure, I think it would have been fair for me to get in to NU. Looking around, I think it would have been fair for many of my peers and friends to get in to their dream schools. The NNHS class of 2014 boasts a diverse group that brings an array of academic, athletic, and creative talents. By the standards we’ve set for college admission, acceptance would have been fair.
But life isn’t fair. We don’t always get what we believe we deserve.
Instead we are left with the journey that took us to these rejections. We’re left with the late night study sessions, practices, and club meetings, the early mornings and the late nights that took us to this position of denial.
Rejection notices have made us believe that all of this was worthless. That’s simply not true.
Ultimately, we didn’t go to NNHS just to get in, get out, and go to college. In our four years here, we have grown in to the people we now present to college admissions committees for approval.
And honestly, the people that I will share my final semester at NNHS with mean more to me than a piece of paper that told me I wasn’t good enough.
Maybe, in the eyes of Northwestern University’s admission committee, I wasn’t good enough. But they haven’t seen my journey. I believe that I am, and I define my future, not them.
I worked hard for a Northwestern acceptance letter, and maybe it would have been fair for me to get one. Maybe I even deserved one. But I never got one, and I never will. Instead, I got what I believe to be exponentially greater.
I got the girl who will cross the stage at graduation six months from now. I will go to a college that recognizes that.
Fellow NNHS Senior • Jan 1, 2014 at 10:28 pm
“When that email arrived, I finally got a taste of life – and it’s bitter. Yet, for me, and for many of us, these rejection notices are our first glances at the real world. For those of us who are growing up now, in the millennial generation, this reality check is real.”
We have all been living in the real world for our entire lives. If we have not yet experienced rejection or hurt or something besides the warm cushiness that Naperville gives us, how are we ever supposed to live by ourselves in the harsh real world of college?
I also didn’t really like your hinting throughout the piece. Statements like these:
“And sure, I think it would have been fair for me to get in to NU.”
“Maybe, in the eyes of Northwestern University’s admission committee, I wasn’t good enough. But they haven’t seen my journey. I believe that I am, and I define my future, not them.”
“I worked hard for a Northwestern acceptance letter, and maybe it would have been fair for me to get one. Maybe I even deserved one.”
…all state that your worth is dependent on an acceptance letter, which contradicts what seems to be the reason you are presenting for writing this article: that we are worth something whether or not we get into the colleges say no to us. And that is all based on the premise that our worth comes from acceptance into our top college. And if that is what you believe, and it is why you are writing this article, then you deserve to get rejected from Northwestern. Because projecting your hopes and dreams onto someone or something will always fail you in the end, because that someone or something has a human basis, and humans are fallible. Learn to not put your hopes and dreams in something so finicky and you will be better off.
“And honestly, the people that I will share my final semester at NNHS with mean more to me than a piece of paper that told me I wasn’t good enough.”
I don’t believe this at all. If you thought that your fellow high school classmates were more important to you than a Northwestern acceptance letter, I bet you would have lived your life much different. Would ” the late night study sessions, practices, and club meetings, (and) the early mornings” still have taken place if you had prioritized people over NU? No.
“I will go to a college that recognizes that.”
No, you will go to a college that the benefits of you attending their school outweighs the cost. Maybe its the GPA or ACT score that will add to their average. Maybe they project you to do something great with your life, like write for The New Yorker, and they want to latch on to you so they can parade your celebrity around future prospective students or alumni looking for a reason to give money back to their school. They will only recognize “the girl who will cross the stage at graduation six months from now” as a means to an end. And that is the real rejection that life has played on all of us, that it is bigger than all of us.
I don’t want to sound like a jerk, and I tried not to make a personal attack. (That part about you deserving to be rejected from Northwestern is hypothetical because I can’t read your mind, only what you wrote.) I just didn’t really like the message of the piece and what you were implying and I wrote my response accordingly. I hope you will see where I am coming from.
Sarah Grace • Dec 20, 2013 at 12:11 am
I didn’t get into any of my top choices as a senior at NCHS, so I completely understand this feeling. Looking back, as a junior in college, I can’t imagine myself at any of the schools who rejected me. I found my home. It might be in the place you least expect it, but you’re going to find that place too!
Fellow Reject • Dec 19, 2013 at 7:36 pm
Do you honestly need the university’s big name to achieve what you want from your life and your work? Do it without them – that way, the university doesn’t get credit for your success. You do.
You don’t need them, sweetheart. You need to prove to them that rejecting you was a huge mistake.
David Hollander • Dec 19, 2013 at 2:42 pm
Well done and quite right! My daughter faced a similar experience. And it’s terrible… and freeing! The school you choose will be so fortunate and appreciative. I suppose it’s neither here nor there, but I am proud to know you and to have been one of your teachers. Thanks for putting into words the frustrations of many, and into action the best possible response to it.
Happy holidays!
John Klein-Collins • Dec 19, 2013 at 12:00 pm
How we respond to life’s curveballs says more about us than most of our achievements. Allie, I am exceptionally proud of the way you have responded to this situation. I have read your open letter to some of my colleagues, and they commend you for your exceptionally mature approach. You are wise beyond your years. There are other schools out there, schools where you will find your niche and be better for it.
Ali Bee • Dec 19, 2013 at 11:28 am
Pecorin, this is a wonderful piece and I am even further amazed by the outlook that you carry despite the rejection. I read this aloud to both my parents, and we reflected on my being rejected from a school I loved. However, the place I’m in now is perfect beyond compare, and my entire household agrees that you will reach past any and all predetermined ideas of success that you had with the idea of going to NU. Can’t wait to see where you end up, kiddo. Keep on keeping on, you’re amazing.
Amy • Dec 19, 2013 at 8:54 am
The magic isn’t in the school but in the student! You clearly will do well wherever you end up! It takes a lot of guts to put your rejection letter out there for the world to see.
Kristin Doherty • Dec 19, 2013 at 12:47 am
I also was rejected from Northwestern University, and now I’m one of the more successful journalism students from my NNHS graduating class. Sure, NU is a great journalism school. But you can be successful elsewhere, and you can learn just as much, if not more, from whatever school you choose. And based solely on this column, I have no doubt you’ll be plenty successful, too. So don’t worry. There’s more to life and college and your future career than a rejection letter. Best of luck to you!
Current NU Student • Dec 19, 2013 at 12:19 am
Hey,
I came across your article because it showed up on fb newsfeed because one of our mutual friends liked it. I am currently a freshman in Medill. I am just a stranger to you, but after reading your article, I realize that it’s a shame that my university didn’t recognize such talent, diligence, and strong will in you. I really respect the outlook you have toward your rejection and I think it’s great that you’re sharing that with your peers. Hopefully they can learn from your experience and be as positive as you!
Anyway, I really enjoyed reading your article. Best of luck for the future! With your attitude, you’ll do great regardless of where you end up.
Irina Stolić • Dec 18, 2013 at 9:47 pm
Allie, for as long as I’ve known you, I’ve admired your level of commitment – to gymnastics, to friends, and of course Fall Out Boy. Needless to say, it’s wonderful that you know how hard you’ve worked and even though I love reading your articles, I really value what you have to say. You’re right when you said high school isn’t about getting in, getting out, and going to college. But neither is college. We all have so much more learning ahead of us and essentially, what will be most important is what you decide to do with that knowledge, not where you got it from. You’re a smart girl, so you’ve most likely already understood that. I just really admire how gracious you are about all of this, so absolute kudos to you. You believe in yourself and that’s what will get you where you want to go in life. Everything is to your benefit. This is the best possible thing that can happen to you. The Universe has got your back. When one door closes, another window opens (or something like that). When it comes to this entire aspect of life, it’s clear to me that you’ve got this despite the fact that we’re all living and dancing through it. It’s you who will come out stronger than ever when more of us start having to face such rejection. Thank you so much for being able to teach us this even with helping yourself for this struggle you’ve overcome. There’s just one thing I can really say: Kudos.