By Alex Moss
Yesterday was Halloween, and what I saw terrified me.
I saw examples of satanic worship running rampant throughout the night, in the form of toddlers. Four and five year olds demonstrating worship to a pagan holiday that allows little kids to get away with doing something so sinister, they don’t even realize it.
Of course I didn’t see this.
I saw a bunch of little kids going around and getting candy, or as the uber religious group calls it-Devil worship.
Don’t believe me? Click here!
As much as I love people imposing their religious views on everybody (see Crusades), I think that it will most likely lead to the end of the world. I am not kidding either.
Consider the following: September 11th was planned out by a Muslim terrorist who hated the western world for reasons that are based on religion. You might say, “Well that’s just cause they’re Muslim.”
Not true. Christianity has accounted for the Crusades, Spanish Inquisition, Holocaust, the debacle that is the Middle East, sexual assault on kids, and to be honest the list goes on and on.
Believe it or not (get it?) I am not atheist. I am agnostic-which means I believe that there is something out there, but I don’t think its guy in a beard who tells us what we can’t do because it makes him upset. I think it’s more like a guy up there who is screaming, “STOP PRETENDING I DON’T LIKE THE GAYS!”
Seriously. Why would a God who creates all of us, and loves all of us equally, all of the sudden hate you for truly loving somebody else? Just like how do people justify the United States being a Christian Nation for how we treat the poor? Jesus didn’t just take care of the rich..in fact I vaguely remember him going out of his way to make sure the poor and the sick got taken care of before the King’s did.
The point is we are getting this all wrong. God doesn’t care. Will he get pissed? Sure. But who hasn’t had a parent get pissed at them before? Odds are good they still love you (and don’t give me that thing how they don’t. They do).
God does care about some stuff though. He cares how we treat others. He cares about what we do to help people who can’t help themselves. I’m pretty sure he will be ok with you missing church if you are helping the poor. It’s what Jesus would do.
You know what else I think Jesus would do? Dress up in a sexy firemen outfit, and go trick or treating. Why? Cause he’s a boss.
