Hanukkah–the one time of year everyone wishes they were Jewish.

Let me explain.

Although my last name is Cohen, the most common Jewish last name, I wouldn’t consider myself a “true” Jew. I say this because although my father was raised in a conservative Jewish family, my mom grew up Christian, or as she looks back at it, not going to church but still celebrating Christmas. She knew when she married my father that they did not want to raise children with two religions, so they agreed to raise my brother and I in the Jewish faith though we would still celebrate Christmas with extended family.

To answer the questions you are thinking right now–no, I didn’t have a Bat Mitzvah. A Bat Mitzvah (translation: “daughter of commandment”) is held when a girl turns 13 and symbolizes that the child is accountable for their actions as a Jew. After seeing my brother’s relentless preparations for his Bar Mitzvah, I knew I was not going to put myself through that. Yes, I did attend Synagogue, as well as religious and Hebrew classes. Yes, I celebrate the Jewish holidays, not just Hanukkah. And no, I do not get eight days of presents along with Christmas presents: I get one present on Hanukkah and celebrate Christmas with all of my Christian relatives.

One of the hardest things about being Jewish and living in Naperville is trying to fit in. I can remember the first Holocaust joke I ever heard: “What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza?”

I was seven years old when I heard that joke.

It came from the mouth of a bratty kid in class, and my seven-year-old mind could not think of a response because it seemed as if there was no similarities, let alone a difference.

As I paused to think, the kid responded, “A pizza does not scream in the oven.”

Most seven-year-olds are not familiar with what the Holocaust is, so at that moment I did not understand the context of the joke until I asked my parents later that day. My parents were appalled that another seven-year-old would make a Holocaust joke at such a young age. Little did they realize that would be the first of many times my brother and I would face this type of ridicule.

I’ve endured the jokes that are motivated by hatred over Judaism and the Holocaust, and I have developed a thick skin over the years, but the jokes are not okay because I realize that I am not the only Jewish kid who has felt embarrassed for being Jewish.

Throughout history, it seems to me that Judaism has been a neglected religion, probably because it differs from the typical suburban family’s rituals of church on Sunday mornings and brunch on Easter. In Naperville, Judaism is not the domain, so it’s not surprising that others disfavor my religion.

But during one week in the year, everyone forgets their petty negativity and envy the Jews for their eight days of presents.

During the past week, as I do every year, I ended up answering a plethora of questions about Hanukkah and the Jewish culture. But for once, these questions were out of curiosity rather than hate.

To be clear, Hanukkah is an eight-day celebration of a miracle that occurred during the Maccabees conquering of the Seleucid army. During this time, there was only enough oil to keep a candle lit for one day, but somehow the oil lasted long enough to keep the candle lit for eight days.

I look forward to these eight days each year, not because of the presents, but because I finally feel respected for being Jewish; I am proud to embrace my religion rather than hide behind my last name.

It’s time to start making the Jews feel like everyday is Hanukkah– I am not asking for 365 days of presents– I am asking to be treated with respect and to never be made to feel embarrassed about who I am.

FAQ

What is a menorah?

In simple terms, a menorah is an ancient lamp with eight branches to commemorate the eight days of celebration. During Hanukkah, one branch is lit every day until the entire menorah is lit on the eighth day.

What are dreidels used for?

The words dreidel is Yiddish for “spinning top.” Playing dreidel games is a holiday tradition for those who celebrate Hanukkah, similar to how watching Christmas movies and baking cookies is a holiday tradition for those who celebrate Christmas.

What do people eat on Hanukkah?

Similar to holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas, no family eats the exact same thing. What most Hanukkah dinners consist of is latkes (potato pancakes) and sufganyot (fried jelly donuts).

Is there Hanukkah music?

Sadly, the only popular Hanukkah songs are “Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel” and the Adam Sandler “Hanukkah Song” from Saturday Night Live. There a few other Hanukkah songs, but not many. My personal favorite is the song “Miracle” by Matisyahu.